BRITISH COMICS
BEWARE OF THE TWO-FACED FAG
RED CIRCLE STORY: This episode, taken from
The Hotspur issue: 789
Customer for Cribber.
Mr
Goof, the Second Form master at
The
new boy’s timid expression had gone, for a moment. “My memory’s not very
strong,” he murmured. “I find history dates hard to remember.” “Just where I
‘come in,” smirked Cribber. “We’re bound to have some questions on the period
we’ve been doing from 1789, the French Revolution, to 1914, the First World
War.” “Well?” said Percy. Cribber looked round and lowered his voice. “It’ll
cost you half a crown!” he said. Percy hesitated. “All right,” he said. “I’ll
let you have a list of dates that matter,” said Cribber. “All done on thin
paper, so that you can roll it up nice and small and use it without being
spotted.” “All right,” said Percy. “But I want the half-crown now,” demanded
Cribber. Percy dug in his pocket and handed over a coin. Cribber took it and
winked. “I’ll get cracking,” he said. “See you before afternoon lessons.” He
hurried off, and Percy turned towards the Junior House Common Room. The new boy
looked completely scared of this strange new world, once more. In the Common
Room, Alan and Busty, having fought off all-comers were wedged in a corner,
trying to play table tennis on a rickety table with one broken bat, the cover
of an atlas, and a dented ball. Percy edged through the crowd. Nobody took much
notice of him. Some of the Juniors had tried to rag Percy on his first arrival,
but Percy had promptly fainted, and since then the fags had left him alone. He
moved around so timidly that most of the time the lads didn’t notice whether he
was there or not. Busty caught sight of Percy, muttered something to Alan, and
nodded in Percy’s direction. Percy smiled feebly, and perched on the arm of a
chair to watch. Alan looked across at Percy. Like Mr Goof, he wasn’t sure what
to make of Percy. On arriving at the school, Percy had looked so forlorn that
he had been put in Alan’s charge. Busty had regarded the new boy as a complete
drip, but Alan had felt sorry for him, remembering his own days as a rather
scared new boy. Percy had attached himself to Alan like a limpet, and Alan had
found himself fighting the new boy’s battles. Lately, however, he had begun to
realise that Percy wasn’t quite so soft as he looked. His most recent trick had
been to wangle himself out of fagging by what seemed to Alan a bit of
jiggery-pokery. However, with Percy drooping mournfully all over the place,
Alan still had the feeling that he ought to be doing something to make him feel
at home. He held out the broken bat to Percy. “Here have a go!” he said. Percy
smiled faintly, and shook his head. “Thank you very much, but I’d rather not!”
he murmured. “I’m not very strong.” Busty snorted, and gave vent to his
feelings by smashing a service over the tattered net. The ball whipped up off
one of the many bumps on the table top, skidded sideways, and hit Percy in the
eye. Percy fell off his chair with a yell. He came up again holding his
watering eye, peered at Busty more in sorrow than in anger, and mumbled, “You
did that on purpose, Parker!” Then he stumbled out, holding a handkerchief to
his eye. “you needn’t have done that to the kid, Busty!” said Alan. Busty
nearly blew up. “I didn’t do anything to him!” he hooted. “It was an accident!
Anyway what harm could a ping-pong ball do?” “You scared him,” said Alan. “He
cries for nothing,” protested Busty. “Weepy Winter his name ought to be!”
“Well, let’s not argue about him,” said Alan. “Your service!” Busty bent down
and picked up something from the floor. “Game’s over!” he said glumly. “Weepy
Winter bust our last ball!”
Percy Gets Protection.
Mr
Goof had a pile of exercise books on his desk. It wasn’t often that he had
complete quiet in which to catch up with his marking, but he certainly had it
at the moment. A deathly hush hung over the classroom as the Second grappled
with their test. At his desk, Percy was working through the paper. Looking up,
he caught the eye of Cribber, who was sitting across the gangway from him.
Cribber winked, and Percy glanced at Mr Goof. The master was bent over an
exercise book, and his pencil was busy. Percy picked up the cap of his fountain
pen from the desk in front of him. He poked inside and fished out a rolled up
piece of tissue paper. On it was a list of dates, with notes, a copy of the history
crib that Foxe had made for his own use. “Winter!” snapped Mr Goof. “What have
you got there?” Percy jumped. He had thought Mr Goof was too busy to watch the
boys. But Mr Goof was not easily taken in, despite his mild air, and he made a
habit of glancing up at regular intervals. He had been in time to see Percy
looking at his list. Percy stood up. He looked even more timid and forlorn than
usual. “I don’t know, sir,” he said. “You don’t know?” said Mr Goof. “No, sir,”
said Percy. “It’s a piece of paper Foxe just passed to me. I was trying to make
out what it was.” The whole Form was looking at him now. As for Cribber, he sat
up with a jerk, and his mouth sagged open. Mr Goof looked at him. Cribber had
guilt printed prominently on his face. “Come here, Winter,” said Mr Goof.
“Bring that piece of paper with you, and your examination paper. You, too,
Foxe.” Percy went out, and Cribber followed. Alan watched them go by. Cribber
had obviously been up to something, but after his previous experiences with
Percy, Alan had his doubts about the new boy’s innocence. He also had his
doubts about the way in which Percy had given Cribber away. His simple
behaviour was too good to be true, and in anybody else it would have
immediately been classed as sneaking. Mr Goof glanced at the list of dates, and
turned to Cribber. “Did you give this to Winter, Foxe?” “No, sir,” said
Cribber. “It appears to be in your writing,” said Mr Goff dryly. Cribber
gulped. “Well, yes, sir, I did give it to him, but –” “He stopped. If he explained
about selling the crib to Percy, he would be in a worse mess. “Did you ask Foxe
for this, Winter?” asked Mr Goof. “What is it, sir?” murmured Percy. Mr Goof
looked at him thoughtfully. Then he said, “It is a history crib.” “I don’t use
cribs, sir,” said Percy primly. Cribber glared at him, but Percy looked meekly
at the floor. Mr Goof glanced down at Percy’s paper. “You certainly do not
appear to have used it here,” he said. “You have not started the history
questions. Let me see your paper, Foxe.” Slowly Cribber handed over his paper.
Mr Goof glanced at it. Then he compared the crib. “You seem to be a faster
worker, Foxe. You have done the history questions. You have also made a
mistake. You have given the date of the Battle of Waterloo as 1915 instead of
1815. The same mistake appears on the crib. You must have copied it out in a
hurry!” Cribber said nothing, but glanced at Percy for a moment. Percy was
still looking at the floor. “You may sit down, Winter," said Mr Goof. “I
am entirely satisfied with your conduct in this affair, but Foxe appears to be
the real culprit. However, I advise you not to give your Form-mates away in
future.” “Oh, no, sir!” said Percy. “I wouldn’t have said anything if I’d
realised it was a crib Foxe was offering me. He was only trying to do me a good
turn. He probably didn’t realise it was wrong!” With his eyes downcast, Percy
went back to his seat. Mr Goof turned to Cribber. “I don’t like corporal
punishment, Foxe, but this seems to be an occasion for it!”
He
opened his desk and took out a cane. “Bend over!” When Cribber stood up again,
he looked almost as watery as Weepy Percy Winter. But they were tears of anger
as much as anything else. “Go back to your seat,” ordered Mr Goof. “You will
finish this paper, but you will stay behind and do another test which I shall
set you – without cribs!” Cribber went back to his seat and eased himself down
gingerly. He gave Percy one glance, but Percy was bent studiously over his
paper. At the end of the afternoon, Cribber stayed behind, while the other boys
hurried out to freedom in a cheerful, noisy crowd, Percy sidled up to Alan.
“What happened there?” demanded Alan. “I know Cribber’s a shifty type, but you
sank him pretty thoroughly.” “I know,” sighed Percy. “If I’d realised it was a
crib, I’d have taken the blame myself. But Cribber pushed the paper to me, and
then Mr Goof asked me what it was, and it all took me by surprise.” He looked
round nervously. “But I’m afraid Cribber won’t understand. “I’ll stay with you,
if you don’t mind.” Percy stayed close to Alan and Busty all the evening, to
Busty’s disgust. They saw Cribber at Prep, but Percy hurried out close behind
Alan when Prep, was over, while Cribber was kept back for Mr Goof to inspect
his work. Cribber finally ran Percy to earth in the dormitory that night. He
came bursting in, and Percy, who was just getting ready for bed, Jumped round
behind his locker. “Keep off!” mumbled Percy. “I’ll flatten you, you little
rat!” shouted Cribber. He made a rush, and Percy dodged round the bed. “Come
here you little sneak!” yelled Cribber. He made a sudden dive across the bed,
seized Percy, and began to drag him across the bed. “Help! Let go!” yelled
Percy. Alan ran up from his bed, and pulled them apart. Percy sank on the bed,
pale of face. “I’ll smash him!” shouted Cribber. “He bought that crib off me,
and then sneaked to Goof!” Percy stared at him his eyes wide and surprised.
“How can you say that, Foxe? I’m sorry I gave you away, and I can understand
you being angry. But it was an accident, and it’s unfair to accuse me of
cribbing, too.” Cribber stared at him, spluttering for words. “Unfair?” he
howled. He made another leap at Percy, but Alan pulled him back. By now a crowd
of juniors were standing round, and Jamie Murchison, the Form Captain, spoke
up. “There’s only one way to settle this,” he said. “In the gym, with the
gloves on. After all, Winter did sneak on Foxe, whether he intended to or not.
Percy shrank back, his expression terrified. “Oh, I couldn’t,” he said. “I’m
not strong enough to fight!” “The kid can’t fight Cribber,” said Alan. “Foxe is
too big. Winter hasn’t got the stamina. Look here, Cribber, the only thing you
can do is to forget about it. It’s bad luck that Winter gave you away, but you
have been asking for trouble for a long time.” “Forget it?” shouted Cribber.
“I’ll flatten his pasty little face!” “No, you won’t!” said Alan. He grabbed
Cribber and pushed him over to his own bed. “Now stay there! And don’t try
bullying Winter!” Cribber tried to get up, glared at Alan, and Percy called
over meekly. “Thank you, Alan!” Slowly the dorm settled down. Busty came over
and sat on Alan’s bed. “You know,” he said quietly. “I shouldn’t be surprised
if Cribber’s story is right. It isn’t like him to go out of his way to help
anybody, even with a crib, but it is like him to sell one – and I reckon it’s
like Weepy Winter to buy one!” Alan had a worried expression on his face. “I’ve
been thinking it over,” he said. “I wonder if you’re right, Busty? But, anyway,
Winter’s such a timid little rabbit that I can’t let Cribber bully him.”
Weepy Winter’s Wangle.
The
Second Form went to their room the following day in some fear and trembling.
Although Mr Goof was no tyrant, the boys were still wondering what the results
of the test would be. Mr Goof came in, and dropped a pile of papers on his
desk. “I burned a lot of
The Duck-Pond Ducking.
Percy,
with a parcel of clean shirts under his arm, watched a car drive off into the
darkness. He had spent the evening with his mother, and now he was off to
The
boys walked away. Percy remained crouching behind the truck. He intended to let
Cribber catch the bus before him. The fags made a noisy crowd in the pavilion
the following afternoon. They were soon changed – all except Alan Reader. He
was wearing a pair of shorts, and nothing else. “Come on!” said Busty. “Can’t
find my shoes and singlet!” said Alan. Busty came over to help him look, and
Percy joined them. But Alan’s running shoes and singlet were definitely
missing. Jamie Murchison put his head round the door. “Put me lower on the
list,” said Alan. “I’m looking for my shoes.” The runners began to leave.
Cribber Foxe trotted off with a smirk on his face. When it was Busty’s turn,
the shoes were still missing. Busty went off, and Alan turned to Percy. “No
good, I’ll have to borrow some,” he said. “I’ll have a last look,” said Percy.
He went hunting around, and came back with a pair of running shoes. “Those are
mine!” said Alan. “They were under a locker,” said Percy. “Thanks,” said Alan,
thrusting the shoes on. “Oh, darn it, my spare singlet’s at the school.” “I’ve
got a spare,” said Percy, producing a neatly-embroidered singlet. “Thanks,”
said Alan, pulling it on. “Gosh, it’s tight. Sounds as if a stitch went there.”
“It doesn’t matter,” said Percy. “It’s my turn now. I’ll tell Murchison you’re
following.” Once clear of the school, Percy stopped, took off his singlet and
turned it inside out. Then he trotted on. Approaching Carter’s Farm, he put on
speed, shot past the duck-pond, and disappeared quickly down the lane. Behind a
hedge, Begg and his pal grinned at each other. Number forty-three,” said Begg.
“The next one!” Alan trotted up, wearing his tight-fitting singlet embroidered
with P.W. He was near the duck-pond when the tough Lington lads burst out at
him. “Nice day for a swim, Percy!” cackled Begg. He dived at Alan. Alan taken
by surprise, staggered back. Then recovering, he hit Begg in the eye. The other
lad jumped forward, and Alan pushed Begg at him. The toughs weren’t expecting
opposition, and they paused for a moment. Then they came back. Alan took the
attack to them, and dived at Begg’s legs. Begg went down, and all three boys
rolled on the ground. They rolled too far, and there was a splash as they
entered the duck-pond. Begg went in first, but that didn’t stop Alan getting
wet as well. He pushed Begg’s face under, stood on the other lad’s stomach, and
scrambled out. Begg made a grab for his leg, but then there was shout. Mr Goof,
who was acting as an umpire, had come back from his check-point to see what had
held up the last runner. The toughs squelched out of the water and fled. Mr
Goof came up to Alan. “What on earth happened, Reader?” “I don’t know, sir,”
said Alan. “They just jumped out at me.” He looked down at his soaking togs.
The embroidered singlet was very muddy. The initials P.W. were almost hidden.
Alan squinted at the initials. Percy had obligingly lent him the singlet. And
Percy had found his shoes, just in time for Alan to take Percy’s place in the
running order. What’s more, one of the toughs had called Alan “Percy.” “Sheer
hooliganism,” said Mr Goof. “Yes, sir,” said Alan. But inwardly he was now
convinced that Percy didn’t need anybody to look after him, after all.
There are too many stories
to list here about the
© D. C. Thomson & Co Ltd
Vic Whittle 2003